Ok now for Thursday…
B4 I start..
Theres 7 ppl who looks like u in this world rite.. ever since half of dem in ur country. And u r the one who always see dem? Well I did. I saw 3 fella who looks like my guy.
One is, my guy himself, 2nd guna, 3rd another fella. The amazing part is, all the 3 are frm Ngee Ann. Weird. Or maybe, I miss him sooo much.. tt whoever I see, looks like him? perhaps perhaps perhaps..
1st 3 hours of lab ended kinda fast. Den wen for lecture. Didn’t pay attention. Too busy exploring Kian Wei’s Sony Ericssion touch screen hp. But wadever it is, my Dopod is the best! Haha! den wen for lunch.. at quite a lot. Den wen up to maths class. Over there oso AL and i laughed a lot. Didn’t pay attention but copied the answers.. AL was ‘combing’ my hairs on my arm with ruler. Den she called tt ind fren, Thammy as Dummy.. for tt we laughed. She purposely leaned on my arm n copied the answers on the bored. This gal ah.. den aft a while, I pinched her. And she yelped, “AW!” damn loud sia. Those arnd us looked at her.. cldnt stop my laughter. Wallau… we kept laughing, making fun of each other n all. Haha.. gundus.. we can nv be bored of each other. =)
Eh.. we’re not together. We’re jus frens. Gd frens. Dun tink otherwise if not, I’ll ask AL kill u. den she go jail. YAY!
Den aft maths, tuition at Teban Gardens. So, played my PSP all the way there. Waahid, my kindergarden bf was beside me. I mean I met him in jurong east interchange. He took train frm clementi while I took bus frm school to jurong. The tuition place is 2 blks away frm his hse. He was talking n talking n talking all the way in the bus. I was too busy playing PSP to pay attention. Well, I did listen. But at one point, he laughed. I looked at him blankly and suddenly laughing cos of his reaction. He tot I was laughing at wad he said. Sorry da… tuition was alrite.. the boys were listening to me as if im some kind of a preacher. Haha. cute la these boys. And not 4getting the pri 2 gal. shes clever. I’ve came across 2 primary 1 gals who were damn weak in reading, but she wasn’t. and she did well for her Pri 1 yr end exam. Im part of the reason!
Nice feeling though. To have someone succeed in their lives/exams cos of u.. haha… im humble.. im not boasting arnd.
Called my Prince while walking to the bus stop. Duno wen is he gonna be tired of bullying me la.. glad tt he loves to see me laugh.. =)
With tt happiness, I broad the bus which jus arrived. And my face turned sour. Cos the bus stink! It smelt as if the bus came directly from india. Inside the bus, most of dem are INDIANS frm INDIA. Oh man.. like mini little india.. damn.. air con bus somemore.. god.. but soon, one by one alighted la..
Den I was lost in my own little world.
I was thinking why am I like this? Hw wld it be if im still naughty n naïve n dun care attitude like b4? Wad if im still attached with my ex? Wad if this n tt.. wahh damn a lot sia.. bus reached JE oso I was still standing. Didn’t alight. I was like stoning with thoughts. Den smthing made me go down the bus. Den I realize I was stoning. And tts wen, AL came to my mind. She’ll happily stone infront of u. dun care if u toking or wad. U’ll be wondering if shes listening to u or not. Tt made me laugh.
But seriously.. these thoughts made me wonder…
I’d be playing around. Spoiling my own image n lost my virginity n all.
But den, the talkativeness, stubbornness, laziness, naughty is all in my blood. Im like this since young. I cant change these. Its like my trademark! Haha.. I was known as the talkative baby ever since I was a baby. Cant tok properly oso wanna talk n talk n talk.. u noe the baby talk? I was like keep on talking. Everyone loved me. haha.
I’d getting a guy.. going on, den break off. Den get a guy, go on den break off. Den get a guy, go on den break off. Again n again. Like nobody’s business. I wont be as matured as I am now.
Prabz. The guy who was my fren. Den became my guy. Den became my fren. Den bestfren. Den guy again. Den best fren again. Now? I duno. Jus a fren? A best fren perhaps? I duno. I really duno.
I confess. I did grew matured with prabz arnd. Hey tt fella is 4 yrs older den me le. But behaves like one whos arnd my age! Compare him to my bro, (both same age), makes me feel my bro is like 30 plus.
Tts prabz’ gd point. We had many similarities. But two differences. 1 : hes a guy and im a gal. 2 : hes damn matured but I was on the process of being one.
Yes of cos, we both have our childish minds. Prabz changed me in a way.. made me think for myself. Judge myself. Understand myself. and he was also there to guide me through. I liked the way he scolded me. haha. if im hurt by someone, instead of supporting me, he’ll scold me saying I did this wrongly.. tt made me go closer to him.. but haishhh… fate la…
I went on with 2/3 guys while we both are close frens. He was there wenever im up n down. Its like ur hp. Ur hp will be with u all the time. Even if u cry or scold. Haha.. im not saying prabz is my hp. But hes my little boy.. the one whom I was ready to give up everything/everyone for. But den, our destiny wasn’t to be together as a couple but as frens. He gave up his love on me, jus cos I said so. I told him we cant be together for these n those reasons. He thought abt it. And let it go. I duno if he really let go or wad la.. all I noe is, I had a difficult time coping with the change of relationship. Frm bf/gf to frens. Heart pain la. The gd thing behind this is, he got a gal who loved him more den me. jus like wad I told him! jus tt shes more conservative. And I got a guy, who loves me more den I do.
Prabz always says this, (referring to me) “ I got a gal who loves me more den I do, I got nth to lose ”
Den aft we finally agreed to be frens till the end he said, “ get a guy who loves u more den u do.. dun get hurt anymore. “ I still rmb.. infact, I rmb every single thing abt him. tts shows hw close I was to him.. I rmb the day I talk to him as if it was yday…. Its written in one of the post here..
Prabz.. though u aint here for me like hw u used to.. u’re still in me.. ur thinkings and ur matured-ness.. I see a Praba in Nazirah. Wad to do la.. moolams.. haha…. yea I noe, im attached. Tt doesn’t mean, I’ve to 4get u. I’ve to get rid of u. my guy noes abt u. like ur gal, he doesn’t like me talking to u. but, he didn’t force me to 4get u. he gave me all the rights to be frens with u. even if he doesn’t, I’d still talk to u. u’re the onli one who understood me completely. 100%. If I tell this to him, he’ll get pissed. Everyone wld la. So I didn’t. not to say he doesn’t understand me completely.. he does la.. I cant say 100%. arnd 98%? Tts more den enuff.. we’re together for a yr now, didn’t see each other for 11 mths. I cant expect more.
But wadever it is rite, im always ur “Typical Princess” who loves building fantasies and get heartbroken wen those fantasies didn’t come true. I bet tt I’d be running to u n crying.
Of cos I got Rahima and the rest. They dun understand me like u n Prince do.. tts for sure. If im sad inside n happy outside, u 2 can found out. But not the rest. If I got a choice, I’d marry the both of u sia.. hahaha!
*complains* one oredi cannot tahan.. now 2…
Den I was thinking wad if I dun get Asan.. tts my Prince. Haha.. his name is Asan for your information! Hahaha! Tt fella, I can say, hes great. He changed me a lot. Frm inpatient to patient to everyting.. except for the talkativeness, stubbornness, laziness, naughtiness. Currently he gave up on this. Hes waiting to get back to SG den see abt this. Hahaha! U cant my boy..
Hmm.. I 2 great gifts from God. Asan & Prabz. Haishhh…
Why cant seem to let my best friend goooooooooooooooooooooooooo!
Im attached to a lovable donkey! And yet im still thinking abt my bestie. Whether hes alrite/eaten/slpt/etc???????????????????????????????????????????????????????
Hes attached toooooooooooooooooooooo!
Arrrrrrghhhhhhhhhhhhhh……….. h e l p
Aiya… im going crazy.. all these I was thinking in the bus.. yea, I did have tears in my eyes....
Reached home. Showered for an hour. Lost in thoughts. Wasted water. Ate. Called Prince and complain.
Hahaha.. and he called me “Complain Queen” wen I said im still a princess, he said, “ no no, I promoted u edi” waaaallllllllaaaaaaaau… hes cute.
I was telling him, I cant seem to stop caring abt Prabz and all.. den he said, cos of the friendship u guys had. U 2 were very close I guess.. den he said if I still love him.. I was quiet. Den I asked why? he said, “assume u still love him, I’d let u go. Cos ur happiness is mine. (he took my line! Toopid) I wan u to be happy. If u going back to him makes u happy, I’d let u go. At the same time, I’d try my best not to let u go. Cos I noe, tt if u’re gone, my life wld shatter. U changed my life without u realizing. I had a bad intention abt gals jus b4 u entered my life. And u gave me a big full stop by giving me ur love. And I am sure tt I wont be myself if u’re gone.” I told him, “ even if give me a chance to go back to him, I wldnt. Cos Prabz is now attached. I dowan to go into his life, make some appearance, den his gal unhappy den they fight… I dowan to be the reason. You taught me to be happy with wadever I hv/get… like u said, I too cant be myself If I dun hv u in my life..” and he said, “ ma, I really love u da. “ weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!
Ok sorry.
Prabz.. I noe theres smth wrong with ur relationship. Smth missing. But be happy with wad u hv k ya? And pls pls pls pls.. try to meet me.. I really wanna look at u and laugh at u.. hahaha! We both are gd in tt rite? Bullying! Hahaha!
Im glad u let me go… I’ve found this wonderful guy… and im sure, u’ve found urs too.. but its slow in processing… tk things slowly yea?
Hmm..
I love u both!
